evolving,carnival roadtrip...

Friday, February 24, 2006

A private poop...

Awoke from fitful sleep at 5:30am because Hamster is in our bed AGAIN. I followed Brazelton's advice when he was a wee man hoping to skip the family bed. Nothing is wrong with having a family bed, it just wasn't right for our family. We made it almost 6 years and now we have it.

Had coffee- must get more 1/2 and 1/2.

Biscuit asked if I would wash his coat for Tahoe- boy I wish I could hand someone my things to do,if even for a day and when I got home it was all done with dinner planned, shopped for, cooked and clever conversations and intelligent questions about my life at work.

1 hour discussion on the phone with mom- Mom! my rock, my lighthouse on foggy days, my mentor, my cheerleader. She says I give to much, think to much about really basic stuff. I put to much pressure on myself to be a good mom. So many other mamas just do it and I ponder, agaonize about how I'm presenting the chore/task/idea to Hamster and if it's the "right" way, will it make him a good person, will he need therapy etc.
Our discussion then lead to me whining about making dinner, calling the family to the dinner table only to be sitting there alone, waiting for them to get there asses there. She said and I agree with her, that I should just go ahead and eat. But my mind wanders to 1. A family that eats together is better off. The kids do better in school. They don't do drugs
2.It's one of the few times we are all together.
3. I worked hard to make this family snugginess, it's important to me.
So where does that leave me- sitting at the fricken' table myself not accomplishing the goal.

A HUGE, HUGE issue for women, moms or primary caregivers. If I had the energy,time I would put tags in here about that post on Badgers, about a friend that suggested reading on just this sort of thing. I promise I will get to that soon. It makes for a much more interesting read.

Aunt Flo has just come to town and I'm cranky, and vulnrable, and raw, and tired and all I really want to do is poop alone. Yes, poop alone. It finally occured to me today to tell Hamster to leave the area. Why did it take me 5 1/2 years to figure that one out. I'm entitled to a private poop.

1 Comments:

Blogger Daisy said...

Hey T!

I'm so good at telling my girls to leave the area that it backfired on me the other day. I was in the abthroom and heard a rattling at the door and yelled, "I'm having private time!"

Hazel replied, I was just bringing you this magazine to read."

Oh. Thanks. Sorry.

7:00 AM  

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